Dolly Parton has come to rescue Jessica Simpson, although we think it's a bit late for that now. Mike Myers and Paris Hilton won several insulting awards over the weekend. Ladies, don't despair: your best sex comes in your forties. Thanks to this kid, the porn thief has been captured....

I had this epiphany last night, while I was sitting at the Churchill's bar sipping my third Jack and Coke: Every single bar in Miami (and possibly the whole country) has at least one TV set tuned...

The city of New York must have the highest concentration of cameras and wannabe film-makers on the planet, and yet no one seems to have had the wit or fortune to film a passenger jet landing safely on the Hudson river. A still photograph of the aftermath of the miraculous landing was beamed all roun...

Hero co-pilot of the Hudson Jeff Skiles, who was right there in the cockpit when Primary Hero Chesley Sullenberger landed that plane in the river, is finally breaking his silence! He's in the tank. Skiles, who is not chopped liver, ya know, becomes the first crew member to speak to the press, since ...

The pilot of the US Airways Airbus that was forced to crash-land in New York's Hudson river after both its engines failed has told investigators he made a split-second decision to attempt a water landing to avoid a possibly "catastrophic" crash in Manhattan. Captain Chesley "Sully" Sullenberger's ac...

Some passengers screamed, others tucked their heads between their knees, and several prayed over and over: "Lord, forgive me for my sins." But a man named Josh who was sitting in the exit row did exactly what everyone is supposed to do but few ever do: he pulled out the safety card and read the inst...

A giant crane last night set about hauling the broken Airbus A320 jet from New York's Hudson river as investigators sought to pinpoint what had caused the near-disaster, from which all 155 people aboard the stricken plane escaped alive. As details continued to emerge about the dramatic emergency lan...

Chesley "Sully" Sullenberger, the pilot who successfully landed an airplane in water, and kept everyone onboard alive, is a Hero. So how long until he ruins it? Or until we ruin it for him? It's cynical, but it's true. There's already a Miracle Airplane Seat for sale on Ebay. One of the plane's pass...

Homeland Security Struggles To Stop New Terrorist Threat NEW YORK - Early reports suggest that a bird strike was responsible for a plane crash in New York's Hudson River yesterday, leaving government officials scrambling to explain how such a large breach of national security occurred on their watch...

We've seen (and heard) the word "hero" tossed around, particularly during the past eight-years, like Bernie Madoff sales pitches, sometimes given to someone truly deserving, more often, bestowed to some dwarf, fink, phony or fraud. Chesley "Sully" Sullenberger. Hero! Major fucking hero! Big-Time Mr....