New cheese follows newish/soon-to-be-more-important starters around our beloved college football. Name: Chris Rainey Substantials: Tiny. Fast. Jiggle-equipped. Aware of all three and prone to showing it. 5-9, 156. Forty: somewhere between 4.24 and 4.4, depending on which reality currency you accept ...

Your Fulmer Cupdate is brought to you by Rampage Jackson, who reminds you that black on black crime is acceptable only if it gets his belt back. The board is Brian’s; his pants bulge with a manliness only Reggie Nelson finds comparable to his own. Clarifications and Award of Points. Jamar Horn...

Julio Jones, turbofreakbot wide receiver for Alabama who shone despite having to catch loopy, errant passes from the heartbreakingly beautiful John Parker Wilson this fall, has been elected to the Alabama Student Senate despite no being on the ballot, not campaigning a lick for the seat, and stating...

Torrey Davis, the Florida defensive tackle knifing in on the fourth and goal stand there, is not dead, booted off the team, bolted at the ankle to a tutor, or any other such foolishness as you may have heard. According to Jeremy Fowler of the Orlando Sentinel, Florida is not giving up on Davis, even...

Tuscaloosa, Alabama. A television studio. A single chair sits off-center on a carpeted platform. The offseason edition of the Nick Saban Show is set to begin, but in the spot where co-host Tom Roberts usually sits instead holds a flat screen television. Enter COACH NICK SABAN. Coach Saban: Christ, I...

The weather and cabin fever prior to spring practice can only be blamed for the psychobilly freakout that occurred this weekend in an active Fulmer Cup scoring session. The Big Board is updated and brought to you by Brian, who is hung like Reggie F’n Nelson. Incidents, clarifications, and rank...

Fulmer Cuprising! Iowa; Ohio State; and Arkansas. All three strike with a boozy determination to bolt their teams into the Fulmer Cup race. Full update shortly with points awarded, but the most active weekend of the Cup season has a common thread running through it: the need to get crunk no matter i...

For just $35, you and your loved ones can get your faces rocked off by the Dark Lord of Rock himself: NICK SABAN. That’s only a dollar per soul-scorching glare! Or fifty cents per use of the word “process!” The Crimson Caravan Tour will hit all of the top spots, of course: Bimini, ...

Kiffykins strikes again, this time back in South Florida, where Tennessee is recruiting Florida commit Matt Elam. Elam will be a senior, says he is fully committed to Florida, and that nothing will change that–all fine and dandy by us. It’s not like Tennessee is going gangbusters after s...

Oh, it’s on, you adorable, bewhiskered motherfucker: “I’m gonna turn Florida in right here in front of you,” Kiffin told the crowd at the Knoxville Convention Center. “As Nu’Keese was in the meeting, his phone kept ringing. One of the coaches says, ‘who̵...