This is one of those blogs where part of my brain says, “You probably should keep this story to yourself.� All while the other half goes, “This is kind of funny in a disgusting and fucked up way.� Awhile back I was driving and received a text message on my phone saying, “Hi. I would apprec...

I usually dip into Seventeen Magazine to help answer the questions of today’s youth but I switched it up for the more wholesome Teen Magazine where the girls were getting really awful advice. Here are four questions that I selected and a fifth that I would like you to answer. Q: I really like my f...

As the only person who possesses breasts on Pointless Banter (sorry guys, moobs don’t count) I can tell you that women are constantly assaulted by images that the Almighty Cock is King.  With the Power of the Penis, a single Pizza Delivery Guy can turn lesbians straight. When coupled with a b...

My undergraduate fraternity held its annual formal in New Orleans.  My junior year, Bob and I rode together and took a couple of girls we weren’t dating but had some interest in dating. By the time we’d finished the drive and gone to dinner, the two of us realized we’d incorrectly...

Time to revisit the series Great Lies That Women Have Told Me. Well I don’t know if I could call this a series considering I wrote the first installment over two years ago but whatever just go with me on this. Today I cover the topic of lockjaw. Now the idea of lockjaw was first given to me from a...

A friend of mine pointed an article out for me to read. It was about having better sex. Apparently, it has come to my friends’ attentions that I am a complete and utter hornball that will stop at nothing in my smarmy daily routine of watching fat toothless women in Disney halter tops fall on i...

If you’re someone who buys stock in the once-a-year-blowjob economy, then you know that this Saturday is Valentine’s Day. I hate Valentine’s Day. I’ve always hated Valentine’s Day, whether I was single or otherwise coupled.  I recently found myself in a greeting card s...

Yahoo and Glamour magazine teamed up to write an article about the six guys you shouldn’t date. Once again they totally missed the mark with their assessment. This isn’t the first time I have caught Yahoo lying about relationships: Ladies Don’t Listen to Yahoo For Relationship Advice (...

I once went out with someone who had a robot fetish. We had met online, so I didn’t know he had a robot fetish when we started dating. Apparently “robot fetish” is not one of those things that you put in the headline of your personal ad. He didn’t look like someone who had a ...

digg_url = 'http://pointlessbanter.net/2009/02/02/new-michael-phelps-sponsorship-opportunities/'; If you haven’t heard pictures of Olympic golden boy Michael Phelps have surfaced of him taking some hits from the bong post Olympics. I think most people would agree that a little pot smoking isn’t ...